When I think about customer experience, I don’t picture surveys or star ratings on a review site. I picture a face. A person who had an interaction with me or with my business — and the story they’ll go away and tell. That story might be about how easy and uplifting the experience was, or it might be about how clunky, confusing, or disappointing it felt. Either way, customer experience is never neutral. It always leaves an imprint.

I’ve learned over time that customer experience is really a reflection of leadership. It’s not something you tack on to the end of a sales process or hand off to a customer service team. It comes from the choices leaders make about values, culture, and priorities.

Looking Through Their Eyes

One of the most humbling things I’ve ever done as a leader is to step into my own business pretending I’m a first-time customer. It’s amazing how quickly the blind spots show up when you do this. The small delays. The tone of an email that sounds colder than you intended. The clunky process that makes perfect sense internally but feels like an obstacle course to the person on the outside.

The truth is, as leaders we can get so close to our work that we forget what it feels like for the person on the receiving end. Seeing through their eyes takes intention. It takes slowing down long enough to notice the little things — because it’s almost always the little things that add up to a big impression.

Leadership Is Always in the Room

I used to think customer experience was mostly about training. If you train your staff well enough, they’ll deliver great service. But over the years I’ve realised that training is only one part of the puzzle. What really matters is the example set at the top.

If I rush, my team feels rushed. If I’m inconsistent, my team will be inconsistent. If I value care and clarity, they’ll value it too. Leadership is always in the room, whether I’m physically there or not. Customers can feel it.

This is why I say customer experience is a leadership choice. Every time I choose speed over quality, silence over communication, or short-term gains over long-term trust, I’m making a decision that shapes the experience customers have.

The Power of Empowerment

One of the turning points in my own leadership was recognising that empowered people create empowered experiences. Early on, I held too tightly to control. I wanted everything to be done “the right way,” which usually meant “my way.” The problem was, my team didn’t feel free to respond to customers in the moment. They hesitated, second-guessed themselves, and escalated small issues that could have been solved with a simple gesture of care.

When I finally started giving them permission to act — to make decisions in the moment, to use their judgment, to offer solutions without waiting for approval — everything shifted. Customers noticed the difference. The energy of the interaction changed. Problems got resolved quickly and often with creativity I wouldn’t have thought of myself.

What I realised is that customer experience can’t be scripted into existence. It has to be lived. And that only happens when leaders trust their people enough to let them bring their full selves to the role.

Consistency Over Perfection

One of the myths of customer experience is that it has to be flawless. But I’ve never seen perfection win loyalty. What wins loyalty is consistency.

When people know what to expect, they relax. They trust. They stop looking for cracks. And when something does go wrong — which it inevitably will — they’re more forgiving because they’ve experienced enough consistency to know it’s not the norm.

For me, building consistency has meant setting clear standards and rhythms in the business. It doesn’t mean stripping out personality or flexibility. It means there’s a reliable backbone to the experience so that customers don’t get whiplash depending on who they talk to or what day it is.

The Story Customers Tell

Here’s a question I ask myself often: If a customer told a friend about their experience today, what story would they tell?

Stories are powerful. They spread further and last longer than any marketing campaign. A delighted customer will talk about the way they felt looked after. A disappointed customer will talk about the frustration or the sense of being let down. Either way, leadership determines which story gets told.

I remember one client who shared, unprompted, that they chose to come back not because everything had gone smoothly, but because when it didn’t, we owned it. We acknowledged the mistake, fixed it quickly, and treated them with respect. That story has probably done more for our reputation than any “perfect” transaction could.

Experience as Strategy

Some businesses treat customer experience as a nice extra. For me, it’s strategy. It’s the most reliable growth engine there is. When customers feel cared for, they stay. They spend more. They refer friends. They leave positive reviews that influence strangers.

Investing in customer experience is not about bells and whistles. It’s not about free gifts or flashy programs. It’s about creating an environment where people feel seen, heard, and valued. That’s what builds loyalty.

My September Reflection

September always feels like the start of the race to the end of the year. For me, it’s a good time to pause and look at the experience I’m creating right now. What story will customers tell about me in the busiest months ahead? Am I leading with care and consistency, or am I unintentionally letting pressure push me into shortcuts that customers will feel?

These are uncomfortable questions sometimes, but they’re necessary. Because in the end, customer experience is the reflection I leave in someone else’s life. And as a leader, I get to decide whether that reflection is one of confusion and hassle, or one of clarity and ease.

Closing Thought

Customer experience is never an accident. It’s a mirror of the choices leaders make every day. I’ve learned that I don’t need to be perfect, but I do need to be intentional. The way I lead shows up in the way my customers feel.

So the question I keep asking — and I invite you to ask too — is simple: If customer experience is my legacy, what kind of legacy do I want to leave?